omgeeee so im workin my regular 9-5. as emails come in i'm adding to my to do list on my white board for later. and then..i see an email. for some reason, this email came in at like 9am but it didnt pop up on my phone until like 1130am. It was New Skool Rules asking if i'm still interested in performing in the netherlands. WTF. so i immediately respond YES. in formal words lol. and do a quick google search of flights. 3k+. i close it right away because i kno how prices go up the more u search. this is a later task. np. side note, i really want to go to Catfish tuesday night jam, it's been a MINUTE. but with this now, im thinking ok ill just go for an hour or so after work. anywho, i ask a few ppl who know about grants, general concesus is apply for travel grant ASAP (first for me) and maybe I can get 1k back…so now im like. hmmm am i moving in haste again…should i stop to make sure it's worth it to spend soooo much money and go so far solo, to perform for a few minutes. but here's the thing, NSR is one of my top 2 festivals to get into. Showcase festivals don't pay but if you put on a good show, it could change your career. You get to perform in front of real industry professionals. just like BreakOut West, but this isn't focused on Western canada. NSR is worldwide and focused on urban music. bruh. Mouraine's been there, Arlo's been there, I'm sure Sinzere's been there. man im just goin all inside my head yesterday. i have to go. i'm going. I will find a way like I do with my whole life. why not. Lately Ive been investing in myself, investing in my music, i used to search out ways to only do this for free because I just don't have the funds, free vids, beats etc. through collabing. my time for yours. just vibe. but i spent about $200 applying for festivals and awards ive never applied to before. let's see what happens. Breakout west was the first festival i spent money on to apply, and i went to manchester in december, and got into new skool rules because of links i made there! anywho im off topic, shit. mmmm ya, yesterday. So my head is spinning because i want to be excited that im going, also i feel like im already there, and i cant afford it. It's on mom's credit card for now. and i will be paying it back for months. and im okay with that. i literally had a headache cuz i felt like i was feeling so many things. i couldn't concentrate. I reached out to everyone for advice that i possibly could. Catch the universe now….so last week i decided to sit and do my taxes, why? who knows. but now I will have a tiny bit i can just throw on this trip right away. or have $500 in my pocket for food when I go! Oh ya forgot to mention, usually when u get into these showcase festivals, you know wellll in advance, gives you time to apply for travel grants, you can bring your band, team, etc. because showcase festivals don't pay, it's an opportunity. so back to universe, taxes, cool, one of the 2 other artists that I know, and happen to be going to the festival as well, Trp.P, is performing like 20 min after me at the same venue. so boom, i can ask one of them to dj my set. i'll bring my laptop, and for the first time just have a long 12 min mp3 of my performance instead of having the dj start and stop the songs ya know? all they gotta do is press spacebar on the laptop once. and it'll just run through. I can practice it over the next 4 weeks until the show. oh ya, this shit is in 4 weeks. ok ok sooooo, after work now it's time to investigate the real logistics of this trip and HOW i'm going to make it work BAMN (by any means necessary). then. thanks to my trip to the UK in december, partially funded by CADA, i remembered ppl travel by train there. like everywhere. and i was going to go to prague when i was there last time. so boom i found a flight for $1200 round trip to london. then the bus/train to rotterdam will be around $500 maybe even less. I'm working on that today, last night was a mess. and my mom really wants points so i guess im helping her with her xmas trip this year by doing that so it works out. i dont feel burdened on anyone yay lol. so live on twitch last night, i was on the phone back and forth with a few ppl, and booked my flights! one part down. yay. the accomadations are a whole other thing. im looking at around $1500 alone for hotel, travel around, food, festival ticket, and best blv i'm getting into all the networking events i can! im going to be there friday may 12, network the shit out of the wknd, then i perform sunday may 14. so i can talk myself up, then prove it the last night. i got this! im hoping this opens more opportunities for me and the band. the city deserves a win. we'll see! i'm a show whore. i love performing. im trying to get more used to performing on the spot. #virgo i like to prepare lol. oh and im starting my first go fund me. ugh. im not excited, i dont like beggin for money. always felt like, if i dont have the money for it then i dont deserve it. but ya know what yall, $5 helps. honestly. so i'm gonna be setting that up today. my goal is 3k. right now, i'm trying to just stuff everything in a carry on and backpack. I'll probably do a pop up show fundraiser. TPE gracefully offered the venue in support of a fundraiser. Soooo i'm thinking 3 avenues. for ppl who dont like fo fund me, they can use the tip jar on my website or donate cash at the fundraiser.